So I found this little blog called Wednesday Wickedness. It's a series of memes, which are questions that are asked that several people answer on their own blog. There are several out there, some are pretty racy, which intrigue me, but I don't want to be THAT transparent, so I'll stick to the Safe Side and push the envelope a little And since I like the "WW" of this meme blog for obvious reasons, and I've always wanted to participate in a meme, I'm going to join in this fun and see where it takes me.
1. “All women do have a different sense of sexuality, or sense of fun, or sense of like what's sexy or cool or tough.” What do you do to feel sexy?
After I shave, I apply lotion -- the kind with little bits of gold in it, so that I shimmer. I look over the top of my glasses at you, or play with my hair while we talk, maybe bite the corner of my bottom lip. I will also put on a sexy bra & panties, wear some heels (hey! That means I go to work sexy every day! hahaha!). I have various other items & behaviors that open up my inhibitions & I'll leave it at that.
Generally speaking, though, I feel sexy most of the time because it's not just a mood or a feeling, I *am* sexy. *strut*
I love that your definition of sexy doesn't necessarily match mine. Takes a lot of pressure off the hunt, right? Well, in theory, it should. Yet, we get wrapped in the gnarly, twisted untruths and allow our burning and yearning to expire. Sexy is subjective in the realm of attraction, and you can own your own sexiness.
Me? I find long, wavy hair on women to be extremely attractive, especially brunettes. Smart looking glasses on anyone are appealing. I find intellect and a sense of humor to be verrrry sexy, mixed in with some flirty banter and a passionate flare. Latin and dark-skinned men who smell like Cool Water and have a nice chest & arms are tickets to Hot Damn! for me. You men out there -- chivalry is sexy. Open the door, pull out the chair, carry my groceries, fill my car up with gas, let me walk into the elevator first, anything to make me feel special = supersexy!
2. “I don't think the money people in Hollywood have ever thought I was normal, but I am dedicated to my work and that's what counts.” Do you think people think you are normal?
I know I don't feel normal, that's for sure. The older I get, the less I feel normal, which truly isn't such a bad thing. I don't want to create a box for you, nor do I want to fit into yours. Let's honor each other as each other. Thoughts I have, experiences I live -- my overall journey -- they are all MY normal, and I'm learning to be more comfortable in the sense of who I am to myself, others and the world at large.
I have a 'normal' life if the definition of 'normal' is one mortgage, two cars, two kids, a husband, a full time job, housework, lots of volunteerism, taking care of parental units, escaping my routine for a playful jaunt here and there, then, yeah, I have 'normal' and I'm like the rest of you and you think I'm 'normal'. Right?
3. “If you ask people what they've always wanted to do, most people haven't done it. That breaks my heart.” What have you always wanted to do?
Finish college. Act in plays as an adult. Be a good singer. Take some dance classes. Be money-savvy. Learn how to play the harp. Globetrot. Write a book and it be published. Have a physically healthy lifestyle. Own a vacation home. Be good at math. And ohsomuchmore!
4. “There's something about death that is comforting. The thought that you could die tomorrow frees you to appreciate your life now.” What do you appreciate the most about your life at this time?
I appreciate many things but first and foremost is my faith. I also adore and have gratitude for my family, my friends, my work.
I feel like I'm contributing to the Saving of the World. I feel like I do God's work (for the most part). I appreciate struggle and pain because I know that's me in a growth phase. I appreciate the gifts my social circle give me every day that range from phone calls, emails, smiles, thoughts, prayers, hugs, and so on. I am blessed and loved and could not want for more!
Am I ready to die today, though? I don't feel ready for death. Death does not sound like freedom to me. Death sounds like a passage to me. Yes, death would relieve my fear, anxiety, angst, struggle. I don't think I've completed my work, so I welcome the burden of fear, anxiety, angst, struggle, so that I might earn and be worthy of my place in God's House.
5. “Where ever I am I always find myself looking out the window wishing I was somewhere else.” If you could be somewhere else, where would you be and why?
I have fought a deep desire to run away for a couple of years now, and bring my family with me. I want a more adventurous life in Europe. The thrill of knowing various languages, the ease of travel, the culture and international flare of living there is very appealing to me. There's a certain glamour attached to it, in my opinion. I'd give anything for my kids to grow up in a multi-cultural environment outside of the States for a while.
6. “I need more sex, OK? Before I die I wanna taste everyone in the world.” Have you ever felt that you need more sex to be happier?
Um, yeah! Who DOESN'T feel this way?! If you don't, then, um....sorry? (I might be kinda of dude-like on this one..... another reason I don't feel 'normal' as above. *laughing*)
7. “If I make a fool of myself, who cares? I'm not frightened by anyone's perception of me.” Have you ever made a fool of yourself? If yes, spill.
Yes, of course I have! Everyone has at one time or another. Admittedly, I am constantly worried and mindful of what others think of me. It's important to go through being a fool, so, I accept that I'm foolish and will still carry on witmybadself! (Just don't laugh too hard at me -- I might cry!)
8. “I don't believe in guilt, I believe in living on impulse as long as you never intentionally hurt another person, and don't judge people in your life. I think you should live completely free.” How often do you feel guilty?
Well, I *am* a fairly new Catholic, so, yeah, I do feel guilty about things fairly often, and guilt comes easily! I've been working on this a lot, actually, because I've arrived at the belief that women especially over-guilt themselves. It's important to be self-accountable and accountable to others, but life is life and you learn from it.
One thing that I think (hope) is true about me is that I'm pretty open to lots of people and their lives/lifestyles. It's part of the journey; it's part of the progress of self. There is no room for judgment. Where there is judgment, remove it and fill it with L O V E! What people need most in this life is validation and compassion and L O V E. Is that so hard?
Once you achieve the (dis?)position of being totally, unconditionally loving, you will be free and others around you will be, too.
9. “I never like being touched, ever. People used to say I held my breath when they were hugging me. I still do.” Are you ever uncomfortable being touched?
No, I'm not uncomfortable being touched, so long as it's a loving gesture, EXCEPT, I abhor when people try to tickle me because I'm not ticklish. For some reason, some people think they know better than I do about me being not ticklish, or they think that me being ticklish will occur in honor of the occasion of THEM tickling me, but um, no. NOT so. I don't enjoy being hit, either, unless it's sparring and I'm winning. *wink*
Run your fingers through my hair, kiss me on the cheek or hand, lightly touch me, leaving a lingering hand around my waist... I love it all.
10. “Oh, God, I struggle with low self-esteem all the time! I think everyone does. I have so much wrong with me, it's unbelievable!” Give us an example of what you’ve done when feeling low self-esteem.
Always I struggle with body self-image issues. Always. Food and weight constantly are on my mind and it's my consta-struggle. I have some lovely features such as my hair and eyes, and I have a nice rack. hahaha! My ass is flat and I have a full figure, but I manage to do okay in attracting the opposite sex, but still, that "I am ugly because I'm fat" tape is on loop in the ole noggin.
I'm also learning that I avoid confrontation and goal-setting, which enables me to have lower self-esteem. Because I crave keeping the peace, I end up sacrificing myself in the process. It's a hard and fear-filled gesture to set a boundary at this age and stage. If I owned the confidence that what I have to say, the way I feel, the way I act or react is valid and might change a situation, a person, or action, I would be more structured and successful in matters of money, education, goal-setting, ambition, personal achievement. It's easy to not disappoint anyone (especially myself!) when there are no goals to set and achieve, which means my self-esteem is not compromised.
~Whoosh!
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