Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Sentimental Mental-ness

I can hear her back there pretending. She supposed to be sleeping.

A few moments ago, I walked past her bedroom and she was sitting at the edge of her bed. There, in the closet-light-is-still-on darkness, sat a vivid, curly-headed blonde three year old dressed in sleevless panda stamped jammies, wearing a black, tassel adorned, velvet beret that she obviously fetched out of the dress-up clothes basket in the closet. She sat there, looking a little sad, maybe even lonely, in that black hat. Her sister is already fast asleep, nestled in a cloud-like feather comforter. I wondered in that flash of a second what My Little One could possibly be thinking as she pondered on the edge of the bed.

Tonight, when I arrived home from work, My Little One was adorned in princess-wear. She had a golden tiara, pink laced and bejeweled. She floated around the house in her satin white dress that My Eldest wore as a flower girl in a wedding five years ago. Tiny pink ballet slippers covered My Little One's feet. Sitting upon her nose were the hugest, sparkliest, pinkest, cat eye shaped sunglasses. "We have a play for you, Mommy! Come sit down!" She pulled at my hand after I set down the bag of groceries, my purse and my canvas bag.

My Eldest was dressed like a pirate. She had tied a zebra print bandana 'round her head and wore a typical skull and crossbones pirate's hat.

The imganitions of these two are nothing short of amazing. My family was all royally entertained in a span of three minutes witnessing a full story of a princess wanting to see life outside the castle, sailing the oceans blue, conquering a sea monster and returning home safely. The pirate turned out to be a narrator, and when needed, a devoted princess protector.

Tonight was one of those especially golden moments when I was both so happy and ever sad. These days are numbered and I don't get nearly enough of them. Yet, the ones I *do* get, I treasure! Plus, it's SO RARE to see them GET ALONG together! It made me go back and look at old pictures of my kids. You know what THAT means.... *whisper* tears. Yeah. They came and came and are still coming.

I don't know why God picked ME to be the woman to receive these two exquiste, smart and bubbly children, but I could not be more humbled and thankful....

Monday, May 25, 2009

Weekly Word of the Weak: Perspicacious

That's a twenty dollar word if I ever heard one!

1. having keen mental perception and understanding; discerning

I read that in a Facebook status message of all things. And it was part of the definition of a True Hispanic.

Couldn't it apply to *anyone* being a True {insert your own thingie here} Blogger (ahem).

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Weekly Word of the Weak:Vascillate

Like "oscillate", "vascillate" is one of my favorite words. Basically it means to waver between one thing to the next. Here is the more technical definition.

verb (used without object), -lat⋅ed, -lat⋅ing.
1. to waver in mind or opinion; be indecisive or irresolute: His tendency to vacillate makes him a poor leader.
2. to sway unsteadily; waver; totter; stagger.
3. to oscillate or fluctuate.

I am in the midst of this action. I do it sometimes in the context of my spiritualism. As much as I love my faith and Trust the Process, I sometimes find myself in a moment of time, checking out of the conversation at hand and thinking to myself, "why does this even matter?".

It sounds more cruel and heartless than I mean it to be when typed out like that. Truly, it's not a matter of me being bored of what you're telling me. Nor is it a matter of me ignoring you. Rather, I question. It's what I do. My mom even said it to me earlier tonight, "You and your dad. Your mind is always going. Random things, always going." She's right.

I am vasciallating between what my every day purpose is and how it plays a role in the saving of the world. Ultimately, I believe we all have a role in saving the world, even though I have a limited capacity in what 'saving the world' could possibly mean. There's no way I could fathom 'saving the world'.

Yet, I feel called to leave an impressive legacy. Tonight, at the American Jewish Congress Women of Spirit Awards, I heard one recipient say: Strong families grow strong people. So true! I even wrote it down in my red book that I carry with me everywhere for moments just like tonight. So, back to that legacy. Yeah, I want my children to be real contributors in the world. I want my family to be talked about among the community. No, I don't expect recognition. I would hide in a cave is someone publicly acknowledge our volunteerism, our impact on relationships, whatever the case may be. But I want people to meet me, to meet my family, and walk away feeling more complete, more loved, MORE than they were before they met any of us. You know why? Because when I meet people, *I* feel MORE. I'm bigger in my heart. My soul is more profound. My behavior is more tempered. My words are kinder. I need to feel that energy. By absorbing it, I'm able to re-introduce it into The Mighty Universe and reciprocate that energy.

Then, I wake up. Shower. Make a lunch for My Eldest. Get her ready and off to school. Take my vitamins and supplements. I interact with co-workers, friends, family, royalty owners, whomever. I do my filing. I type on a keyboard. I clean my house, the lawn gets mowed, y'know, just the mundane. The monotony of life, that which is bane. Why? WHY do I DO these things? What do they matter? For a few years now, my answer to these question is "...because they are necessary so that the world can be saved."

Is that true? Do I really need to know if its true? Because if I knew. would I change the way I act and behave? Would I fear even more and laugh even less?

What's the purpose of making my bed?....of waking my kids up to go to school?

I'm rambling....and getting nowhere. Sounds like my bed is calling me, so I'm going to scurry off and rest. Hopefully I won't vascillate, as I so often do, between good sleep and sleeplessness.

BTW -- the questions in this blog are rhetorical. No need to answer, but I welcome any feedback.


Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Allen Americans

MORE minor league hockey is coming to the Metroplex! LOVE IT!

Welcome the Allen Americans! Allen is a little closer to my house than North Richland Hills (Home of the Cup-Winning Texas Brahmas).

I'm already looking forward to next year while enjoying the NHL's Stanley Cup Playoffs. Since I don't like pro hoops, golf or baseball, this is the only fix I can get until Cowboys mini-camp. Such a dry spell over the summer, but oh well, I do have a family. hahahaha

Sunday, May 10, 2009


Happy Mother's Day out there to all you mothers - young and old, new and experienced. Happy Mother's Day to the Godmothers of the world, and to the women who desire to have children and yet haven't. I know that you are nuturing in a loving way, in a maternal way, in your magical way that is perfect by God's design.

To my mom, I love you. Happy birthday eve. I'm glad your friends are in town, and wish you all the best of fun! You are in so many ways my heroine.

And, without the Holy Virgin Mother, none of us would be in the position of be a mom, have a mom, issue motherly accolades to whomever we look to as our 'mother'. Happy Mother's Day, Mary.

Sunday, May 03, 2009


I'm getting more addicted to hockey. Today's excursion isn't helping my addiction. Well, maybe in a wicked, sordid way it is, but still, it's getting bad.

I have no doubt there are VERY avid hockey fans out there that know waywayWAY more than I do about hockey in general, to include everything from incept to current about all kinds of hockey stats, teams, The Cup. These people in all likelihood know lots & lots about more than just the NHL. There's IJHL, USHL, IHL and the CHL and all kinds of HL's. Keeps a girl's head spinning!
Since my Stars FAILED, I haven't given up on watching the Stanley Cup playoffs. Hopefully a U.S. team will win, but I'm kinda hoping Vancouver does something, too. Not sure why -- possibly because I learned about Mats Sundin and now I have mucho respect for that dude.
Anyway, today, I attended the CHL's Texas Brahma's (formerly Fort Worth Brahmas) game three championship game against the Colorado Eagles. It was much very so fun! Our seats sucked, but one of the nice thing about a venue like where we were is that people are moving around all the time, so we got to scooch over a bit in order to see the whole ice. Literally someone had taken a sharpie marker and wrote 1, 2, 3,.... for the seat numbers on the metal bleachers.

Do you even know what a Brahma is?! No, it's not the Hindu God of Creation in this case. This is Texas, people. What do we have in Texas?? On to other important game notes....
Top Five Things I Liked About This Hockey Game
1. The intimacy. Very close setting. A sign was posted on the outside of the door to our seating section that said "Be Careful of Flying Pucks". When I read that, I was so wishing I was wearing a goalie's mask or had brough my baseball glove!
2. Staying true to hockey roots, the world was represented. The fact that the Texas, United States AND the CANADA flags were all represented was awesome. Why there's a Canadian flag in a conference that includes only the states of Texas, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Louisiana, Mississippi, Colorado, and Kansas is rather fascinating to me. Add to the mix that most of the players had last names that suggest non-American born status. Not saying they're not American, I'm saying their names were on the international side of the fence. (I'm crushing on Kuninnen already, and I'm inclined to cheer for 27 since that's the date of my birth. Then I was digging #26....)
3. The fan participation. Whenever the Brahams scored a goal, it appears the tradition is to throw little foam bulls the size of your fist onto the ice. Then the little kids skated out with ice brooms to collect them for later use. I paid $4.00 US for two of them. With that purchase came a raffle ticket to win a game puck. For every goal scored in the game (this one was 6-2, Brahmas), they drew that many tickets. We didn't win. Fans took off their shirts, rang cowbells (how Texan of us, huh? How predictable.), and chanted "you suck" whenever they got the chance.
4. Although I didn't have one because the very thought of what goes into them grosses the holy hell outta me, the hot dogs were HUGE. I mean, these things had GIRTH. And they were reasonably priced. If it were winter, and they were bears, I think the hotdogs shared between my family would likely sustain them for winter hibernation. Most of the food was reasonably priced and a good-size portion.
5. Nice folks. At a Stars game, the crowd can be judged as pretentious. The girls that go there have a reputation of being available for pick up, and dress to the nines. Considering how much tickets to pro games are around here, it's definitely a game for the well-to-do. So the folks at the minor league game are just folks. They might be classified as working class, redneck, mom & pop, yeehaws. My family falls into that "working class" category.
Top Five Things I Did Not Like About This Game
1. Right next to where we were sitting were two game consoles that were very distracting and disruptive. An XBOX NHL game was available to play, and a PS3 motorcycle game was available as well. The effing motorcycle game would rumble even when no punk 10 year old was playing it. Grrr!
2. The seats we had were desperation seats that had a horrible view except if you were sitting right next to that which is described above. The seats were $10 US each, and My Little One got in free because she could sit on my lap. While we were able to lean against the back of the arena for extra back support, there was a small enough crevice between the bleachers and the wall where My Little One's puppy pull over is forever lost to the Under Bleacher Depths of Hell. Even if it could be retrieved, um, no. Not going down there. *I* might never make it back!
3. The lines to the bathrooms are too long! (Isn't that true for just about every major public venue?)
4. The P.A. system sucked balls. The announcer with a burly voice was muffled. The next big investment needs to be improving that sound system.
5. The arena is a shared event arena. A teenager volleyball tournament was going on in the arena across the walkway from the hockey game. It'd be nice if the minor league team could have their own venue and not have to share it with the high schoolers. The high school across the street from the venue is the size of a community college. Certainly they can have their own sportsplex!
Overall, this was a supersofun experience. The drive out there wasn't bad, especially since we got our new hybrid. The metroplex endured quite the thunderstorm event yesterday, so today's weather was lovely. Cool, even brisk. The kids both napped on the way to the game, so they were perked up and not grumpy while watching -- what a blessing!
I'm gonna keep an eye on the rest of this series. Hopefully you'll cheer for the Brahma's, too!

Friday, May 01, 2009

Weekly Word of the Week + A BONUS Word: Fecundity & Confirmandi

I'm realizing how many words I'm learing from my faith. Funnily enough, I think Catholicism can be more than a religion and way of life -- it can be it's own language! (For example, the ambo is Catholic for the priest's chair on the Altar.)

"Fecund", root of "fecundity", is not what it sounds like. When you read it, did you do like me and sort of associate it with the word "fecal"? (Ewww!)

I was reading this Catholic publication that is printed monthly called the Magnificat. May is the month of Mother Mary (of course since Mother's Day is in May.....).

In the Magnifcat, it lists a litany of Mary-related blessings, one being that God proved the fecundity of Mary by giving her the fruit, Jesus Christ, for the world.

Go check it out...

BONUS WORD: Confirmandi
I was a proud teacher earlier tonight! Every May 1st in my parish is Confirmation. Fifteen of 69 students were mine that received the Sacrament of Confirmation. It's the third in the three Sacraments of Initiation (Baptism, First Eucharist and Confirmation). These days, the Sacrament of Confirmation typically occurs in high school age, sometimes even as early as eighth grade. My kids are all in tenth grade.

I was blessed and honored to the sponsor of one of my students who took the name of St. Anthony of Egypt (also known as St. Anthony of the Desert). He is the patron saint of Africa. Julia, Vitus, Therese of Liseux, Sebastian, Andrew, Roch, Elizabeth Ann Seton and several other saints were represented by the kids that I've been teaching over the last three years.

In preparing for Confirmation night, the phrase "Confirmandi" was uttered and, of course, it stuck to me like glue. I have since learned that it's plural for one being confirmed in a religious ceremony.

Nothing like Latin to get the pot brewing....

Now what am I going to do with my Sunday evenings?? (I'm sure I can think of a thing or two...*evil grin*)